Lovers who break up when things get tough show these red flags early on

Photo: "Materialists"

When you're in a relationship, the least you want is for the person in front of you to stick around when things get tough. Because life isn't all romantic dinners and vacations. There are losses, financial stress, family problems, emotional exhaustion, and conflicts.

But some men are not built to handle difficulties in a relationship. And usually, they don't suddenly disappear "out of nowhere." The signs have been there from the beginning, we just chose to justify them.

Here are the specific red flags that indicate he will leave just when you need him the most:

1. Let go of the "seen" when the conversation gets serious

When the topic moves from jokes and flirting to real feelings, he disappears. He doesn't respond for hours or days. He only comes back when everything is easy and superficial.

2. It's intense for a few days and then suddenly cools down

One week he texts you nonstop, makes plans, talks about the future. The next week he acts like a stranger. This “hot and cold” pattern shows a lack of emotional stability.

3. He never talks about things that hurt him.

When you ask him about the past or something that has affected him, he ends the conversation with “it doesn't matter.” A person who doesn't process emotions walks away when they arise.

4. Promises a lot, but doesn't even deliver on the little things

It says "I'll come," but it cancels. It says "I'm here for you," but it disappears when you're bad. When words don't match actions in small things, they won't match in crises either.

5. Gets nervous when you express your needs

If you tell him "I need more support" and he takes it as a personal attack, this is a sign that he can't handle emotional pressure. Another sign could be your fear of telling him certain things, simply because you're afraid of him leaving.

6. Never puts the relationship as a priority

Work, friends, the gym, or "I need space" always come before you. When something difficult happens, he will choose himself again.

7. He keeps his life separate from yours.

He doesn't introduce you to people close to you. He won't meet your close people, perhaps with the excuse that it would be embarrassing. He doesn't talk about long-term plans. He always keeps a door open for an exit.

8. I end arguments with "that's just how I am"

And in every argument, you end up apologizing. He doesn't reflect, he doesn't take responsibility. A person who doesn't face his mistakes, doesn't face his problems either.

9. It took you a while to decide whether you were in love or not.

VC at first, he avoids the “what are we?” conversation. He says “let's see how it goes.” And when he “goes,” the moment things get serious, he will have no reason to stay.

10. You withdraw whenever you go through a difficult period.

Are you stressed? He becomes cold. Do you have a family problem? He becomes busy. Instead of getting closer, he distances himself.

11. It makes you feel like you're asking for too much.

If every time you ask for clarity, reassurance, or quality time, he makes you feel "dramatic," this is a sign that he doesn't have the capacity for a deep connection.