"Almost a year ago, unbelievable happened, as my husband watched a movie in the bedroom, I went down to lock the door, and when I entered the kitchen, someone caught me from behind and raped me with a gun in the head. was followed by a complete chaos with police, hospitals, and disbelief: these things did not happen in real life, it could not have happened to me.
People assumed that after the attack I would not want to have sex, or that I would have difficulty intimacy with someone else, but the truth is different. I asked my husband's sex a few days after the attack, when my face was still bruised, I was still broken. I wanted to regain control of my body with someone I loved and trusted. I knew if I was going to wait longer, I would have a hard time.
I talked to other victims, online and in special groups, and I know that many people hardly regenerate their sexuality after an attack. My rabbi was not found and experienced uncontrollable rancor, PTSD (stress disorder after a traumatic event) and machete.
Since that day, things have changed, but I still feel the need for someone to trust them completely - someone I know who loves me, who I know I love back - someone wonderful, fantastic and delightful. I do not think of the assault when I do sex; I do not get in vain. Find comfort and strength from the fact that I did not give up on this part of my life. "
Written by an anonymous woman for The Guardian
