Lifestyle

Why is it hard to get old friends back?

Why is it hard to get old friends back?

Have you ever experienced as a feeling, that typical embarrassment of reconnecting with an old friend who has been out of your life for many months or a long time, with whom you rarely meet, talk on the phone a little, etc. In short, it looks like you are trying to restore communication bridges with a stranger!

Everyone has old friends who are gone or friends who move or just leave. And from time to time, we all think about getting closer. But getting back in touch with an old friend isn't always easy. In fact, as it turns out, many of us actively avoid contact with old friends.

A new study, conducted by Lara Aknin and Gillian Sandstrom, researchers from "Simon Fraser University" and "University of Sussex", both researchers looked at the psychological reasons why people are often reluctant to contact old friends.

"We live in a time when people are increasingly disconnected and have fewer close friends than they have in years past," Sandstrom explained to the Psychology Post. "This also happens because of the large number of communication methods in modern times, telephone, messages, electronic devices, etc. The study found that it takes more than 200 hours of contact to turn a new acquaintance into a close friend, while the reasons why people find it difficult to reconnect with old friends are unclear,” the researchers said.  

People are increasingly disconnected

Researchers conducted a series of studies and found that even though 90% of people had lost contact with a friend they still had an interest in, they often avoided contact due to fear of rejection, embarrassment, and guilt for not keeping in touch. This study found that people find it easier to talk to a stranger than to talk to old friends again.  

Rejection can be a part of our human experience

After all, when a long time passes, you may have changed, the old connection may not be as strong and the same as before, there are many factors that influence this hesitation. All of this can lead to anxiety and fear of the answer, or the lack of it.

How to take the first step and contact an old friend

Be clear and honest in your communication. State the facts, then your opinions, ending with the idea of ??asking for what you want. Be aware of how to achieve the things you want, even when it comes to friendship through the best method.

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