Flori Mumajesi refuses to talk to Fifi and we wouldn't know this if Fifi hadn't said it publicly himself. Not once, but several times : that he writes to her and gets no response and the only thing left for him to do (jokingly) "is to go and break down her door."
We are not talking about a love story here, but about a friendship between two artists, two people who have shared time, ideas, thoughts and collaborations. Precisely for this reason, the situation becomes even more delicate. Because friendships are among the most beautiful relationships in life and, when they are interrupted/ended without an explanation, they hurt.
And yet, without questioning Fifi's sensitivity or sincerity, it must be said that repeated public statements about a relationship where the other party has chosen silence are problematic. First, because they highlight a private relationship where only one party speaks, giving the public a story where Fifi is always the one asking, while Flori chooses not to speak. Second, because they normalize the idea that persistent insistence is acceptable even when the other does not respond. And third, because this constant repetition shifts the pain from a personal process to a public narrative, open to comment, speculation, and judgment - in short, into portal material.
But beyond these, there are two issues that deserve careful analysis.
First, silence is not always a form of rejection that is personally related to someone. Sometimes, it is survival. A person may be going through an extremely difficult period (existential crisis, emotional exhaustion, mental overload, mourning a loved one, etc.) and in these circumstances, withdrawing from communication becomes the only way to stay on their feet. Only someone who has experienced such a situation understands this, when even a simple message “I’m fine” requires energy that you don’t have. These people need to be understood, no matter how much the lack of communication with them hurts us.
Secondly, Flori may have simply chosen to no longer communicate with Fifi. For whatever reason. Right or wrong, explained or not, it remains a personal choice. Silence is not the most beautiful way to end a relationship, but it must be admitted: yes, silence is also an answer.
It happens that we often normalize the constant insistence to talk to someone, to ask for explanations, to not leave a relationship hanging. We call it longing, love, sensitivity, loyalty, etc. But we forget one essential thing: like any other relationship, friendships only exist when there are TWO people who want to be there. When one party leaves, even without giving explanations, we have no choice but to accept it.
Of course, all of the above explanations do not ease Fifi's pain. On the contrary. Her pain, the desire to talk and meet her friend is understandable, human. But the fact that someone is hurt by a relationship does not force the other party to stay, explain, speak or respond, if they can no longer or do not want to.
As a society, we haven't been taught this idea enough: that not always when someone is silent, they are letting us down, offending us, patronizing us, making it difficult for us to insist more. Maybe, they are simply setting a boundary.
Sometimes, silence is a form of communication that signals the end of a relationship. Accepting this, no matter how difficult it is, is neither disrespect, nor lack of love, nor weakness, but respect. For yourself and for the other. :)
