In the latest episode of “The Dalina Show” by Andale Media , psychologist Jonarda Kërkuti discussed with Dalina Buzi a well-known study by American researcher John Gottman, who analyzed over 3,000 couples and managed to predict with 90% accuracy their separation in just the first 15 minutes of a conversation. Gottman identified six main signs that indicate that a marriage is in great danger:
1. Rough start
Gottman notes that the way a discussion begins is crucial. If a conversation begins with criticism or sarcasm, it is more likely to end badly. Statistics show that 96% of the time, you can predict the outcome of a conversation based on its first few minutes.
2. The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse
Gottman identified four negative behaviors that are particularly harmful to relationships:
Criticism: Attacking your partner's character instead of addressing a specific problem.
Contempt: Expressions such as mockery, irony, or insults that imply superiority over the partner.
Self-defense: Responding to criticism with excuses or counter-accusations, avoiding responsibility.
Withdrawal : Emotional and physical withdrawal from the partner, avoiding communication.
3. Emotional Flood
When one partner feels emotionally overwhelmed by the other partner's negativity, they may shut down or become unable to handle the discussion. This phenomenon, known as "flooding," can lead to physical problems like increased blood pressure and rapid heartbeat.
4. Failure of reconciliation efforts
When one partner tries to defuse the situation or seek reconciliation, but the other partner does not accept or ignores this effort, this indicates a lack of willingness to work on the relationship.
5. Bad memories
Couples who have negative memories of the beginnings of their relationship, who no longer feel the admiration and respect they once had, are more likely to experience a breakup.
6. Lack of healthy communication
If a couple is unable to communicate openly and honestly, avoiding important discussions or resolving them improperly, this can lead to separation.
Suggested articles:
