If you've found yourself reviewing an email 15 times before sending it, deleting an Instagram post because it didn't look "good enough," or stressing yourself out over every little detail, then welcome to the perfectionist club!
Perfectionism may seem like an admirable quality - it helps you be dedicated, precise and achieve great results. But it also has a dark side: it drains you emotionally, holds you hostage and often stops you from enjoying the successes you achieve. Psychologists agree that perfectionism can trap you in an endless cycle of self-criticism, fear of failure and unnecessary stress.
So how can you curb this tendency and start to calm down a bit? Here are some strategies that can help:
1. Understand that perfectionism is not a healthy way to live.
There's nothing wrong with trying to do your best, but striving for perfection in everything can be detrimental. Learn to accept that even if something isn't perfect, it's still valuable and important.
2. Ask yourself: “Is all this effort worth it?”
Perfectionism is often a way to gain a sense of control. The next time you find yourself obsessing over a small detail, ask yourself, “Will doing this perfectly really make me happy?” If the answer is “no,” it might be time to back off.
3. Don't forget that perfectionism can negatively affect others.
By noticing every little mistake in others or rejecting a compliment, you can give people the impression that they are never “good enough” either. Your perfectionism can affect your relationships, so learn to be gentler with others as well.
4. Calculate the "cost" of being perfect
If getting a higher grade on an exam means spending sleepless nights and giving up all the things that make you happy, is it really worth it? Perfectionism often takes more than it gives.
5. Put basic needs first before your high standards
Sleep, food, time to relax - all of these are more important than your endless list of things you "have to" do. Put your health and well-being first.
6. Remind yourself: “I am enough”
One of the best techniques for combating perfectionism is the simple affirmation: “I am enough, just the way I am.” This can help you stop the cycle of self-criticism and start appreciating yourself more.
7. Do it and be done - it doesn't need to be perfect
Instead of putting off a project because it’s not “done,” just finish it. Perfectionists often delay their success for fear that something isn’t great. But sometimes, it’s better to do something “good enough” than not to do it at all.
8. Remind yourself that there is always another day.
There's no need to finish everything today. Leave a task for tomorrow, give yourself some breathing time, and understand that no disaster will happen if you don't finish everything right away.
At the end of the day, there's nothing wrong with trying to do your best. But life isn't a test where you have to get an A every time. Give yourself permission to make mistakes, to not be perfect, and most of all, to be human.
