For many people, the start of a new period can bring a tantalizing sense of new possibilities, but this effect can also have its dark side. For those with perfectionist tendencies or who have an "all or nothing" mindset, it can become a constant source of frustration.
What is the "fresh start" effect?
When events like a new year, a birthday, or a new week come along, many of us feel motivated to set new goals. This phenomenon, known as the “fresh start effect,” involves the perception that we are at a new starting point that offers us the opportunity to create a new and better version of ourselves. However, for those who are more focused on perfection, this can be a never-ending cycle of frustration.
Why do new beginnings attract us?
1. Psychological separation: New beginnings create a separation between "before" and "after," giving us the feeling that we can improve and become a better version of ourselves.
2. Motivational energy: When we have a "blank slate," we feel motivated to start something new, believing that change is possible and achievable.
3. Self-confidence in change: This effect often increases confidence that we can achieve our goals, leading us to believe that a new period brings endless possibilities.
However, for those with perfectionist tendencies, new beginnings can become an unhealthy vehicle that fuels the creation of a constant cycle of disappointment and despair.
When a new beginning turns into a problem:
1. "All or nothing" thinking: When small mistakes occur, the brain can rely on the idea that everything has gone wrong and the original goal has been lost.
2. The cycle of failure and abandonment: Small mistakes often cause us to give up and abandon the goal, feeling that it is "not worth it anymore."
3. Impossible goals: Some people set very ambitious goals, creating expectations that, when not achieved, are accompanied by feelings of failure and shame.
How to manage goals without being influenced by the desire for perfection?
Instead of focusing on rigid and impossible goals, you can focus on flexible values ??and goals. Here are some tips:
1. Focus on your values: Instead of setting impossible goals, think about what you value and look for achievable opportunities that improve your life in those areas.
2. Reflect on progress, not perfection: Use questions like, “Am I moving toward my values?” This helps you break down the ideology of “success or failure.”
3. Create an environment that supports you: For example, if you want to read more, place books in visible and comfortable areas. This creates an atmosphere that supports your goals.
4. Accept that there is no right path: Mistakes and periods of no progress are a natural part of the process. Thinking that every small step counts can make a big difference.
