Parents who brag about their kids online usually have these 11 insecurities

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At first glance, it seems like a sweet gesture when parents post about their children on social media, praising their achievements and expressing their pride. The intentions seem pure and child-centered, but in most cases this is not entirely true, especially for parents who benefit financially from their children. Unfortunately, many parents use this behavior as a mechanism to get appreciation and feel better about themselves.

Whether it's comparison anxiety or jealousy of other families, parents who brag about their children online usually have these hidden insecurities. These insecurities are closely tied to how they value themselves as parents or to a need to feel superior to other parents. Often, it's simply a way to live off of their children's accomplishments.

1. Insecurity about their personal achievements

Living through children is a way that many parents deal with their own insecurities. When a parent feels insecure about their own achievements, they are more likely to brag about their child's successes online, sometimes even exaggerating them.

2. Doubt in their abilities as parents

Parents who brag about their children online often doubt their own parenting skills. 

Psychotherapist Deborah Hill Cone points out that this is a defense mechanism against internal insecurities and unfulfilled ambitions. Self-doubt drives these parents to try harder than necessary to convince others that they are good parents.

3. Low self-esteem

When feeling low on self-esteem and needing an ego boost, some parents choose to post to show how proud they are of their children, so they can receive praise and approval.

These parents have fragile egos and are often detached from their personal identity. This behavior can create pressure on children, building an idealized image of themselves online, which can damage the child's self-esteem.

4. The desire for the "perfect" image

For some parents, boasting about their children is more about the image they create than the well-being of the child themselves. They want to show the world a “perfect” life and family.

5. Anxiety from comparison

When parents base their self-worth on comparing themselves to others, they often use their children to cope with this anxiety. Social media exacerbates this feeling, as it makes others appear more successful and happier.

6. Fear of being judged as bad parents

Parents who fear judgment from others see bragging about their children as a way to relieve anxiety. By shifting the focus to the children, the bragging seems more sincere.

However, this behavior can be damaging to children, making them feel as if their achievements do not fully belong to them.

7. Unresolved problems from childhood

Parents who did not achieve their dreams or were not appreciated as children often try to live these out through their children. They push their children to achieve the success they themselves did not have.

Psychologist Julie Powell Thomas suggests that praising children should focus on effort, not just the outcome.

8. Jealousy towards other parents

These parents use their children's achievements as a status symbol. Instead of simply being proud, they constantly compare and compete with other parents.

9. The need for control

Parents who need control want to manage how others see them. By constantly posting about their children, they create unrealistic expectations that make it difficult for children to feel a true sense of accomplishment.

10. The need for external evaluation

A deep need for approval can lead a parent to constantly brag about their child. This is sometimes called “narcissism through the child,” where the child’s achievements are treated as the parent’s personal achievements.

Psychologist Mark Zaslav warns that this can make the child feel like he has to share in the success even when it belongs only to him.

11. Hidden competitive spirit

Some parents view parenting as a competition. They measure their success by comparing themselves to others, but this behavior deprives children of what they need most.