In our closest relationships, we find it easy to talk without thinking long and hard. It seems like a good thing, as it means you get along well with each other and can share what you have in mind without any problems. This is where it all begins, the moment you do not know how to maintain mass and hurt someone else, even unintentionally.
The following expressions are considered by therapists as the most toxic uttered by couples, so even if they have ever come out of your mouth try to avoid them.
1. "It's not a big deal" or "You'll get over it"
Your partner does not need any of these answers. They are hoping to see the problem with their own eyes and help if you can. Saying this seems like he is neglecting his problem and makes him regret why he shared it with you.
2. "You are fixed as your mom / dad"
This phrase that is usually said in the middle of a hot quarrel is the worst finding. Sounds like a double insult and no one would want to hear it. Keep the family away from problems in the couple if they are not involved and reduce such comments. Better deal with and criticize his / her behavior specifically.
3. "You always" or "You never"
This is the most frustrating expression in the world! It automatically puts your partner in a defensive position, while it is good to listen to him to the end without making him feel bad.
4. "You're doing it wrong. Can you do as I do?"
We are assuming you are doing something productive and your partner is making a mistake in the process. You still have to take another approach. You can point it out in a more subtle way and remember that tact is the key to everything. Instead, think of these as actions that you must take on a regular basis.
5. "I gave up"
Going to conclusions like "I gave up", "I want a divorce" or "I hate you" can do even more damage than you think. It is normal to get angry with each other, but extremes do no good to anyone. Count to 10 and then talk, or better yet, do not talk at all. Try to calm down.
6. "How sensitive you are"
What do you mean by this? You are minimizing your partner's feelings and it is not right. We do not decide how the person will feel in the face, so do not make such "pressures" that affect self-confidence and security.
Source: Huffington Post
