Relationships

Are friends sexually attracted to each other, experts say

Are friends sexually attracted to each other, experts say

Girl-boy friendships are common, as are arguments about this type of friendship. Many believe in girl-boy companionship, while many others feel that it is impossible for such a relationship not to cultivate feelings for something more, even if only physical.

But what do the experts say?

Sociologists note that girl-boy friendships are common. They mention many successful and non-romantic friendships between men and women.

Psychologists also find that there are specific benefits to girl-boy friendships: cross-sex friendships help people meet social and emotional needs, learn how to interact with someone of the opposite sex, and meet new perspectives.

A study found that 75% of men and 65% of women have a non-romantic friendship with someone of the opposite sex. After all, it's not that rare! 
Men may be more likely to be attracted to their girlfriends.

One study found that in male-female heterosexual friendships, men are more likely to be attracted to their partner than women. This may indicate that there is some gender difference in how people think about attractiveness in friendship. 

Thinking your friend is attractive is different from wanting to have a romantic relationship with them. Responsible people are able to be friends with an attractive person without wanting to be in a relationship.

For a long time, people didn't make many male-female friendships.

For most of the past, men and women were part of different walks of life and did not interact that much outside of marriage. Today, all genders participate in every walk of life as co-workers, classmates, and friends, so these friendships are becoming more and more normal—and more and more separate from any romantic interest.

Many people mistakenly assume that all men are attracted to women and all women are attracted to men. In reality, in a male-female friendship, there is a good chance that one of them will not be attracted to the other's gender. For example, in a friendship between a gay man and an asexual woman, there is no possibility of sexual attraction between them.

They support each other's romantic relationships.

When someone compliments their friend on dating someone else, it's a sign that their relationship is just friendly. If a person gets upset when his friend talks about a romantic date or how much he loves his girlfriend, he may have romantic feelings.

They have a lot of fun together, but they don't flirt.

If a man and a woman make a lot of eye contact, touch each other's arms, hands and face, get close to each other and blush, it is possible that there is romantic interest between the two friends. 

Observe them to determine if their behavior around each other is abnormal. Some people are flirtatious with everyone, so don't make hasty judgments. If they act like "kids" with each other, unlike they do with other friends, this is another indication that there may be some romantic interest.

Ask yourself, "Are they acting more like brother and sister or like boyfriend and girlfriend?" Brothers, sisters and friends tease or joke and laugh, but they don't flirt like boyfriend and girlfriend. 

For a different perspective on boy-girl camaraderie, watch the GOATS girls episode:

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