In today's world of relationships, new terms are popping up more and more often. One of them is "hiding," or as it's also known, pocketing. Although it's often seen as something negative, experts point out that it's not always the case. Sometimes, it simply indicates a more careful and measured approach to the relationship.
What is "hiding" in a relationship?
Hiding occurs when a person chooses not to introduce their partner to their inner circle, family, friends, or social media. It may seem like an immediate red flag, but according to a study by the Plenty of Fish platform, about 46.5% of people prefer to share their relationship publicly in a slower, more careful way.
Signs that you may be "hiding":
According to relationship specialists, some of the most common signs are:
He hasn't introduced you to his friends or family yet, even after several months of dating.
He doesn't or avoids posting photos with you on social media.
He is reluctant to participate in social activities where he could meet people close to him.
It keeps your status as a couple unclear in public or online.
Why does hiding happen?
The reasons may be different:
Fear of commitment
Doubts about the future of the relationship
The desire to first build a solid foundation before going public
Or, in more negative cases, the desire to keep options open as a single person.
What matters is the motive: is he keeping the relationship private for honest reasons, or is he "hiding" you on purpose?
What to do if you feel hidden
Open communication is key. Talk about your feelings and explain why it's important to you to feel accepted in his life. Maybe he has a valid reason that has nothing to do with you personally, or maybe you'll discover a deeper reason.
How do you start the conversation?
Try to frame the topic in a positive way. You could say something like:
"I really enjoy the time we spend together and I would like to be more of a part of your life, even outside of this space we have created together. How do you feel about that?"
Seek to understand his pace, but also clearly share your expectations.
What if the reaction is negative?
If your partner reacts with vague excuses, it may be time to reevaluate the relationship. A person who is honest and committed will want you to feel safe and respected in the relationship.
When can concealment be understandable?
There are times when maintaining privacy is necessary: ??after a difficult divorce, due to past traumas, complicated relationships with family, or simply to build a strong bond before sharing it with others.
Can such a relationship survive?
Yes, as long as there is communication, clear expectations, and a realistic deadline to come out of “hiding.” If you are both of the same mind and respect each other’s feelings, a healthy relationship can be built even during this phase.
