Many parents think that the involvement of grandparents in the upbringing of their grandchildren is a fun issue that fills them with excitement, hope and happiness. But, according to experts, there are some wrong ways or steps that maybe even unintentionally, grandparents do without getting their parents' approval first.
Here are five mistakes grandparents should avoid:
-Giving gifts or money without parental approval
Grandparents often consider it normal to buy gifts with the idea that their grandchildren will enjoy them, but this is seen as a source of tension if the grandparents have not previously obtained the parents' approval. Sometimes grandparents can get into trouble for buying things for their grandchildren that the parents may not approve of, such as expensive or extravagant gifts, so it's a good idea to ask the parents first.
- Disregarding parents' schedules
Resentment can arise if a grandparent acts as a guardian. Many times, grandparents forget that children are at work with extended hours and full of other commitments, so the possibility of helping and spending time with grandchildren should be seen. Remember, spending quality time with them is more important than quantity.
- Disregarding boundaries
Overriding parental authority and wishes is another area where grandparents get into trouble.
-Criticize the parenting style
Grandparents often have a different approach to parenting that may be at odds with how their children are raising their grandchildren. They may feel disrespected if the parents seem to dismiss the experience, but ultimately, they have to make decisions that seem best for the family.
- We do not work with the problems that arise
Of course, caring for grandchildren can be complicated and often requires grandparents to make decisions. It is inevitable that at some point they will do something against their parents' wishes. How they handle this will set the tone for how the relationship goes. Showing children that they respect their time and authority as parents will help strengthen their role as a grandparent.
Source: HuffPost