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7 signs that you were raised by emotionally immature parents

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15 Mars 2024

7 signs that you were raised by emotionally immature parents

Childhood should be a stage of development, education and fun, but for many children it seems that is not the case. Some children have parents who can provide them with all the material goods, but they just don't know how to support them emotionally. These types of parents are known in the therapy world as emotionally immature parents.

But what are the other signs that distinguish these types of parents from others!

#1 They don't know how to handle their children's emotions

Emotionally immature parents transmit adult problems to their children. They tend to do this because of the hierarchy that exists in parent-child relationships. Parents who are unable to regulate themselves must be very tactful when addressing children, because they often see them as "objects" where they unload all their nerves and insecurities.

#2 They seek emotional support from children

Another big sign is dependence on their children for emotional support. So often, emotionally immature parents expect you to know what they want and need. If you are unable to do this, they may lash out in various ways towards their children.

#3 They lack empathy

Emotionally immature parents are unable to understand how their emotions can affect those around them. These types of parents can struggle to understand their children's feelings and needs and more!

#4 They struggle with boundaries

If the parent refuses to respect your boundaries or has questionable boundaries, this is a red flag. It happens that finding the balance between parents and children is a very fragile division that makes cooperation even more difficult. For example, if you ask your mother to call you before she comes to your house, she may take offense and continue to do so without warning. Of course, this brings problems in the parent-child relationship.  

#5 They use guilt as a weapon

As you grow and work to set boundaries with an emotionally immature parent, you may find that they use shame or guilt as a weapon. If they feel unhappy about your behavior, they will probably avoid conversations and meetings with you.

#6 They often have inconsistent behavior and reactions

Often, when an emotionally immature parent has a rough day at work, they make it everyone else's problem, even though it has nothing to do with the kids or the spouse. This leads to emotional outbursts in the family because they do not have the ability to regulate their emotions and keep them separate from other members, be it the children or the partner.

#7 They don't respect your individuality

When we think of healthy family systems, parents raise their children to be good individuals and persons. When you respect your child's individuality, you see him as someone who has values, beliefs, and boundaries. But, an emotionally immature parent is not able to do this and so the problems begin.

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Source: HuffPost