I have a little problem with my relationship. We have been together for a few months and everything seems to be going well, except for one problem. She still has pictures of her ex on her phone. She says that those photos are "part of her history" and that's why she won't delete them. But, apart from the photos where they are together, I have also seen photos of him alone.
They broke up 7 months ago, but she says her feelings for him faded 2 years ago.
However, I don't feel good about it. Besides, I don't keep pictures of my exes.
When I told her this, she spoke to me in high tones and became aggressive. We ended up getting busy.
How should I react?
First of all, the idea that she keeps these photos as part of her history may be true. A study shows that 61% of women keep photos of their exes to keep memories they don't want to forget. It doesn't mean that they have romantic feelings towards their ex, they just want to keep their photos as a "part of the past". For them, perhaps, every moment is worth remembering, regardless of whether it was good or bad.
However, this does not mean that there is no possibility that she feels something for her ex. It probably makes some sense for her to keep pictures of them together or in a group, but if she keeps pictures of him alone, that could raise some concerns. Although she no longer loves him, she may have some "warm" feelings for him and even miss him.
Jepini asaj kohë, mos i bëni presion sepse ndoshta, ajo do të flasë hapur me ju lidhur me këtë, më vonë.
Nëse kjo temë hapet përsëri, përpiquni t’i shpjegoni asaj se për ty, nuk është e këndshme të shohësh foto të tij në telefonin e saj dhe të mendosh për faktin se ajo dëshiron t’i mbajë.
Sugjeroni që ajo të vendoset në vendin tuaj. A do e kishte problem ajo nëse telefoni juaj do kishte foto të ish-partnereve tuaj? Sa e sigurt do të ndihej ajo në këtë rast?
Mundohuni t'ia shpjegoni këto gjëra me mirësjellje dhe qetësi, pa agresivitet, ndoshta ajo do ta kuptojë.
Nga ana tjetër, mund të përpiqeni ta harroni këtë “problem” tani për tani dhe t'i jepni asaj pak kohë. Edhe nëse nuk dëshiron t'i fshijë këto foto sot, ajo mund të ndryshojë mendje më vonë dhe të vendosë se nuk ka nevojë t'i mbajë më.
Sometimes we tend to keep things from the past that we think we need, but in time we realize that it has nothing to do with our current life, so we move on and let the past go.
Source: Bright Side
