Okay, we know: when it comes to sex, the whole world is starting to understand that pleasure doesn't just lie in the blissful finish. Foreplay, tension, experimentation – they're all part of enjoying sex! For most guys, though, the happy, assured ending is... yes, let's put it bluntly: orgasm.
However, there are people who not only don't mind having this pleasure "ruined" at the climax, but actually seek it out. Called a "ruined orgasm," according to experts, this sweet frustration is part of the fun.
But what is a ruined orgasm, exactly?
It's that moment when you're ready to burst with pleasure... and your partner stops everything. Right there, in the hottest moment! The result? The orgasm is no longer as powerful, and is often incomplete. Maybe it happened to you unintentionally - a phone call at the wrong second, a noise from outside - and the whole moment lost its magic.
How does it feel?
Imagine you're waiting to bite into a chocolate chip cookie you've been waiting for, and when you do, it's... oatmeal raisin. Meh. Not that it's bad, but it's not what you had in mind. The orgasm happens, but it's not what you expected. And for some, that disappointment is sex in itself.
But why would anyone want to experience something like that?
Because for some people, control play is super exciting. Feeling "left in suspense," pausing before the explosion, is like navigating the limits of desire. And if you like dom/sub dynamics, this is a perfect way to play with power in the room.
How about trying it with a partner?
Talk it out beforehand. Give each other the green light for this kind of experience. There is no room for surprises when it comes to such experiments.
Set a security code. If one of you doesn't feel comfortable, the game stops immediately.
Choose how you want to "ruin" the orgasm. Will you stop it with your hand? With toys? With verbal commands? Set the scenario.
Play with the tension. It can be through oral sex, penetration, toys, whatever turns you on.
See it as a game. And then, cuddles, maybe a return to fun… or another change of scenery.
And remember: it doesn't have to work the first time. The most important thing is that you communicate and that you're both there because you wanted to, not because "something should have been done differently."
At the end of the day, an orgasm is an orgasm – even when it's "ruined." And if you know how to play this game well, it can be... a lot sexier than you think.
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Source: Men's Health
