First meetings can be awkward, tiring, and often filled with anxiety. Between long pauses in conversation and attempts to avoid awkward moments, we often turn them into a job interview or ask random questions like, “Do you like cheese?”
Of course, not every date is a terrible experience, but most of them can be exhausting. Getting to know someone new, trying to impress, and keeping the conversation going is a challenge in itself. Often, in an attempt to come across as “cool” or “low-key,” we avoid the topics that really matter—which can lead to a rocky relationship.
Instead of improvising on the spur of the moment, it's better to have a few questions in mind that will not only make the conversation flow more smoothly, but will also help you get to know the person better. Here are some questions you can use to take your meeting to the next level:
1. Start with light conversations
Before you get into deeper topics, it's important to create a comfortable atmosphere. The following questions are simple, but they can reveal a lot about the other person's mood and interests:
What kind of music do you listen to and what was the last concert you went to?
When traveling, do you prefer a planned itinerary or a more spontaneous approach?
What is something you are looking forward to doing this year?
What are your three favorite series of all time?
What does a typical weekend look like for you?
2. Know their values
Many people place more importance on chemistry than compatibility in values ??and goals. But a strong attraction doesn't guarantee the success of a long-term relationship. If you want to understand more about someone's mindset and values, try these questions:
What qualities do you value most in a romantic relationship?
How important is it to you (set a specific value or issue, e.g. independence, emotional security, etc.)?
How do you view splitting the bill at the end of a meeting?
If you could improve one social cause, which one would you solve?
What role do family and friends play in your life?
How do you balance your personal and professional life?
3. Explore their romantic past
Knowing their past history can give you an idea of ??how they connect emotionally and what they expect from a new relationship. These questions can provide a clearer picture:
Have you ever been in a serious relationship?
What was your longest relationship?
Why did your last relationship end?
How do you feel about your relationship with your ex-partners after the breakup? Are you still friends with any of them?
What have you learned about yourself from your previous relationship experiences?
What do you look for in a partner, based on previous experiences?
What do ex-partners or people you were most attracted to have in common?
By asking the right questions, your meeting will not remain superficial, but will serve to better understand whether the person in front of you is really the right one for you. Remember: Questions are important, but answers must also match actions!
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