Sometimes, when everything seems to be going well in your relationship, you suddenly notice that all your friends (either in reality or on social networks); they are breaking up. Although "breakup season" can be a real phenomenon, having a bunch of newly single friends tell you what went wrong in their relationships can make your stable relationship seem suddenly precarious. This is where you start asking yourself, "Isn't it my turn?"
It turns out that, when it comes to divorce, you're 75% more likely to break up with your partner if you see a close friend or family member doing the same (and 33% more likely if it's a friend of a friend ). There's something about seeing so many seemingly great relationships fall apart.
This feeling is understandable, because friend breakups can make you reevaluate your relationship. Dr. Bella DePaulo, an academician of Psychological and Brain Sciences at the University of California, explains why the breakdown of your friends' relationships makes you rethink yours.
“Anyone who's been in a relationship will tell you that it takes work and involves compromises, but it's worth it for the right person. But when you see a friend moving to a new country only to be separated from the boyfriend for whom she did everything, you can immediately start to worry if you have sacrificed something important for your relationship," she said.
"When we see our friends' romantic relationships fall apart, all of a sudden the scenario seems uncertain," says DePaulo. "While it doesn't mean you should break up if you feel like you haven't devoted enough time to your career, it's important to turn that feeling of panic into something useful, like figuring out what areas of your life feel empty." .
Why can breakups be sticky?
Realize You've Left Some Great Friendships Behind for a Relationship That Now Doesn't Look So Good
We've all known that person who seemed to see the friendship as too much, until they got hitched. Since then, you only met on rare occasions when your partner was out of town. Being in a relationship, even when you still try to prioritize friends, makes it hard to find time for everyone.
Lack of freedom
Watching your single friends spend time together while you have to cancel their plan because you have a romantic evening can suddenly make your relationship seem more restrictive. "When you see your single friends embrace their friendship and new life, you're reminded of what's so great about friendship without worrying about what your partner might think or want," says Dr. DePaulo.
Start thinking about the possibility of meeting other people
Seeing a friend who has just broken up and then hearing excitedly about all the new acquaintances she is making can make a change in your sex life seem like the end of the world. While it's normal for a long-term couple to experience ups and downs in their sex life, if the idea of ??ceasing intimacy with your partner seems palatable to you, then this is an important sign.
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