I was introduced to the woman when we were in our twenties and briefly bonded after we met. We got engaged when we were 26 and got married last fall.
When we first met, she was a widow. He had known the ex-husband since they were children (his mother was the husband's nanny) and had been together since seventh grade. They married 18 years. He died in a car accident when he was 20, shortly before she became acquainted with me.
When we started to go out, she was still suffering from his death, panicking and locking herself in the bathroom and crying. I was sympathetic, I comforted her, but she wanted to leave him alone. Over the years, the suffering has diminished and is now no longer mentioned.
Our first Valentine together, I bought chocolates and flowers. She accepted and told me that she appreciated the gesture, but for her, Valentine is a commercial holiday she doesn't like. I told her that it is a day for me to express love and I would like to celebrate it.
After giving them as much as I could, she told me she didn't want to celebrate because she was celebrating with her late husband. Among them, the holiday began with the romantic letters she makes for her boyfriend in elementary and evolved into extraordinary dinners. Consequently, they were married on Valentine's Day. As we were tied up at the time, I gave up on Valentine. I never tried to celebrate it again.
This brings us to this year?s Valentine. God, my blood boils when I think about it. It was Valentine's first marriage and since she never mentions her late husband, I thought why not surprise her with flowers? We have made so much progress. Our relationship is perfect, I love it endlessly and there is nothing wrong with expressing feelings or not? I was wrong. I bring flowers home, a massive bouquet that went for $ 100, and her brain is gone. She told me it was the only thing she asked me not to do and I didn't respect her wish.
She takes the flowers from my hand and walks out of the apartment frantically without wearing shoes. I follow it. She screams at her head and throws the flowers into the basket. Leaving her knees, she falls to the ground and begins to cry like a hardy. I had never seen it so bad. I sit down with her, hug her and apologize. As the minutes calmed down, we returned to the apartment. A few hours pass and I make an even bigger mistake.
She was working on her laptop when I asked her, ?Do you still love her? Am I just another? ? I regretted the words I said the moment they came out of my mouth. I wish I had never told him. We hadn't talked about her late husband since we first got together. But I didn't want to ignore it any longer. The idea was killing me, I had to ask. He didn't answer me. No words. Nothing.
I get angry even more. I know I should have kept the calm, but I couldn't. I scream, I ask for an answer. She gets up and starts packing a small travel bag with clothes. I ask where you are going. No answer. He removes the engagement ring and the wedding ring (the ones I gave him) and puts them on comfort. I miss it there. I no longer felt the body.
Her late husband burned down after she died and she only wore his wedding ring. He kept it in a small box in the sock drawer. I take the box, pick up a hammer and smash his ring. I tell her she's married to me now, I can't believe she's still forgotten. Terrible, I know. I had no idea what was on my mind. She begs me to stop and I stop. I understood what I had done. I was not myself. No way. I would never do such a thing.
She left. I begged him to stay, but no. I tried to contact her hundreds of times but she has her phone off. Or blocked me. I do not know. I called my parents and friends, nobody knows where it is. Or at least they don't tell me.
I know I was wrong. What can I do to fix the situation? Has our marriage ended? I had never been so nervous, I don't know what occupied me. Maybe jealousy. I get the impression that I can't describe it. If he had not died, they would still be together. I'm just saving the place. She has always treated me very well, never compared me to her. She is so hardworking, brave and honest. It has always driven me and supported me to realize my dreams. It was there for me when I failed.
What do I do? I can't lose it, I can't afford it.
Source: Reddit