"The first Sadomazoke fantasies I experienced when I was just 7 years old. My classmates played a game like boys had taken hostage, I always let them catch me.
I began to meet with dominant women (dominatrix) at the age of 24, a fact that I hid from my girlfriend. She found out after marrying and doing what she could to fill my sexual desires, but she did not do it with her heart. She could not see her strong and successful husband as she was humiliated and abused. So, I went to meet with a dominant professional.
In 2011, I met a new dominant with penetrating green eyes. I fell in love right away. For years I went to bed and fancied for her. In 2013 we spent a week together in Sweden and decided that we want to be with each other. We were both married to two children.
In 2014 we left our families and moved together. It was an extremely expensive partition. My wife told all friends and family what happened. We stopped working and lost all friends and family.
I like to take part in different scenarios with my girlfriend's clients. She showed me the magic of dressing like the other sex and the magic of the whole months without sex. I faced unimaginable pain and enjoyed the pleasure I did not know were accessible.
We are respected members of a local BDSM community, which can be called a lifestyle just as well as being called a gay lifestyle. Or such a birth, or not. I hope that one day we will accept this fact, so that in the future, others will not make my mistake: marrying someone who can not and will not respect such needs. "
Written by an anonymous man for The Guardian
