The English-speaking world continues to be enriched with new terms that begin with “man,” as younger generations question inherited behaviors and gender stereotypes. After the already familiar terms “manspreading,” “mansplaining,” and “manterruption,” it’s now time to get acquainted with another new word: “mankeeping.”
What does "mankeeping" mean?
This term describes a role that many women unconsciously take on in heterosexual relationships: to be simultaneously partner, caregiver, and psychotherapist for their husbands. That is, to bear the emotional and organizational burden of the relationship, often without sharing it with the other person.
As The Guardian writes, men have traditionally been raised not to share their feelings with their friends, and as a result, they channel all their emotional baggage onto their partners. What was once considered “commitment,” a woman who covers every aspect of a man’s needs, is now seen differently: Is this love, or is it unpaid emotional and mental labor?
Taking care of your partner is perfectly normal, the problem arises when this care becomes a one-way street. When the woman becomes the sole emotional support, the one who remembers everything, who organizes life, who “thinks for both of us,” while the man does not do the same in return, then we are faced with a profound inequality, which is often normalized.
The term “mankeeping” was also used in a 2024 study by Stanford University.
According to the researchers, the lack of support networks for men is compensated for by women, at a significant cost in time, energy, and personal well-being for them.
When women also become men's nannies
Even when men have friends over (even just for a beer), many women continue to play the role of “nanny” behind the scenes: they schedule doctor’s appointments, organize parties, take care of important dates, in addition to doing all this for their children. This invisible burden, often underestimated, is tiring, consuming and rarely appreciated.
“Mankeeping” is not a term to blame men, but to highlight a silent inequality that many women experience. It is an invitation to reflect: are we really sharing the burden of the relationship fairly? Are we equal partners emotionally, or is one supporting and the other relying?
