Parenting is a difficult job, because in addition to caring, another very important task is also contributing to the creation of a child's character. Many behaviors and actions influence the life, mind and personality of a child, but the power of words is another aspect that must be carefully selected.
What are some expressions you should not say to your child?
"It does not happen that way. Wait to show it ”
If the child is learning something new, he should learn it in his own way, as your intervention gives a clear message that he / she does not know and can not do something. It also affects a child's lack of self-confidence.
"What's wrong with you?"
This phrase may seem cautious, but for the child it is very irritating. If you think that a child is experiencing "something wrong", a child will create the belief that there is a problem, will believe this belief and will act on it. This leads him to think that he is never enough and that he is a bad individual.
"You will never change"
In general, the words "always" and "never" should be avoided because they make the child feel hopeless. This forms a "cloud" of negativity in a child's thoughts and behaviors.
"Hey, you're fine"
If the child is crying, something hurts or is affected by a certain situation, it means that it is not good. What you can do, instead of saying this sentence, is to let her cry, hug and encourage her because it is good to express emotions.
"Okay, I'm leaving, I'm leaving you alone
." give it another trauma: insecurity and the feeling that everyone will one day abandon it.
"Leave me alone"
You definitely need a break, but you can find another form. According to Suzzete Haden Elgin, CEO of the Ozark Center for Language Studies, when you tell your child to leave you alone, it is actually hurting the way he or she conceives of spending free time with you.
"You did very well, why don't you always do that?"
When it starts as a compliment and ends as a critique, it changes the whole course of a child's evaluation. As a result, he will feel isolated and always fail to do his best.
"9 is good, but 10 is better"
At some point, all parents think that their child will become a genius and always ask a lot of him. This puts the child under constant pressure.
"Do not eat because you will gain weight"
When it comes to motivating your child to eat healthy meals, there is no science: focus on good foods, but do not stop sweets or pizzas. Weight is never discussed in a child, as it lowers his self-esteem.
"Why do adult boys / girls cry?"
Everyone cries, even you who are a parent. The fact that you question something like this makes the child think that no one is listening. Linking emotions to age is a mistake, which later affects the impossibility of habits.
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